change, who am i?
who is this girl wearing the ugliest sweater ever and why don’t i recognize her? (thoughts middle school me would have if she saw high school me)
okay so you’ve just now realized you’re not that into pokemon anymore, and it’s really bumming you out. i’m with you. hello, my name is mary lynn and i just turned 19, and my first year of college is coming to a close. (can you say mini freakout???)
in middle school, i was this crazy tiny person who ran around and was crazy. in high school, i was this girl who read a lot of books, and was “chill”. now, i’m in college and i have no idea what is a single word that can describe me in all of my complexity. change happens to the best of us. in fact, it happens to all of us. you won’t notice it at first, but one day you’ll be scrolling through your facebook photos and realize you are not the same person who enjoyed the suite life of zack and cody. some things won’t change either. like fall out boy is absolutely still my favorite band, and i still hate oatmeal. yet i am an entirely different mary lynn these days.
it’s kind of scary you know? how could i have become so different without realizing it, and what can i do to stop it. you can’t. you just have to roll with it. the thing is that, you are incredible. really. you are made of bones, and blood, and veins, and organs, and muscles, and they all talk to each other to make you work. it’s truly incredible. you can form thoughts every day and you have opinions on the weather. you are alive. and every day you are learning new things about yourself. how do you know that you love greek food if you haven’t tried it? isn’t that amazing. there are a billion trillion places you haven’t been and food you haven’t eaten and people you haven’t met that will influence you in ways you can hardly begin to imagine. have you fallen in love yet? what, me neither! but i hear it’s life-changing. and we get to experience that.
change is inevitable, because change is growth. growing into who you are, who you want to be, discovering yourself. so don’t be scared, even though it is scary. i promise you this though, it is entirely normal perhaps even a little exciting?? so embrace the change! take on the weird and the wonderful! do the dangerous! live your life and love yourself! fall in love with someone who doesn’t speak your language! adopt a dog!
this person that is you is waiting to be known. go and find her/him.
i’m doing the same.
p.s. i know my word now. i’m that person who gets really deep, really fast.
documenting the fun years.